Addicted to a revved-up way of being
Katherine Willow’s monthly diary, cont’d from home page
It’s still dark outside this December morning with a blustery wind and a slight creaking coming from our new metal roof that’s being installed (the old one has given up the ghost and is leaking).
Felix is not up yet. He has massively broken his arm after trying to fly from a high place and is in a cast with pins in the bone. It doesn’t slow him down at all and I try not to think about him breaking the other arm. He takes his bone-building supplements with gusto and didn’t need any pain remedies after the operation, only Arnica—which we also gave him right after the break. It helped him stop crying and fall asleep on the way to the hospital where he cheered everyone up with his natural kindness and exuberance.
The doctor tells me the pins will be pulled out without anesthetic and will hurt—but “only for a few seconds”. I wonder how to prepare him for that without adding fear. . . will let you know how it went next month.
In the middle of the turbulence of life, I am more and more aware of being driven by adrenaline, ego, survival anxiety, tension and stress, with only small moments of truly peaceful, relaxed thinking and feeling—even while I pursue (that word is a clue, grin) healing for myself and others. In fact, I am thoroughly addicted to this revved-up way of being and have been since a child.
Not that this is a new revelation or unique to me! We live in a world governed by our primitive needs and the emotions of fear, greed and anger—no matter how civilized we think we are. The new piece for me is that I have less and less judgement about it, gradually replacing intolerance of myself and others with a breathing into and letting go.
Why am I bringing this up?
It is the core of what I see as the central challenge of humanity, individually and collectively, at this time in our development: the transition from living by instincts to realizing that we are souls and learning to live by our inherent love, wisdom and collaboration—together with our instincts, without making them bad. It’s similar to the insight from GNM that diseases are really trying to help us and that understanding this enables us to recover more quickly.
I belong to that group of people who believe that we can make this change, in fact, that we are meant to do it and that the horrors of the world are growing pains of a species that can mature into something unbelievably beautiful. This destiny is already in our hearts and souls—and maybe that part of the brain that we don’t use yet—and can be nurtured in many ways. True healing moves us in this direction and feels like coming home.
The other part of my understanding is that this transition is powerfully contagious. As a few break through into the soul level on gentle breaths, their very vibrations incline others to take the same leap of evolution, trusting our deeper levels of being in everyday life. I think this is the strongest contribution one can make to humanity, this inner growth, much more than any outer activity, including healing centre development!
Sounds like a Christmas message to me.
May your Christmas, or whatever you might celebrate this season, be relaxing, rejuvenating, fun, nap-filled, healing, moving, loving, meditative, prayerful, honest, grateful and even healthy—what a thought!
And here’s to a New Year of gentle and deep change. . . each and all.
hugs, katherine
PS: Before our monthly 1-3pm Saturday Free Talks we’re beginning a monthly free clinic in the morning from 9am-noon (with $2 childcare) — and after the talk we’ll host a ‘movie night potluck’. Come over to the Centre on Sat, Jan. 14 for the movie, Thrive, from 3:30-7:30pm (see more about the movie in another post). January’s Free Talk will be “A Holistic Journey through Death & Dying”.
